I’m really good at juggling you
know. But lately I seem to be dropping a
few too many balls...
I remember when Symon and I were
newly married – I was 18 (yes, I can hear your gasps of horror) and he was 21
years old. Life was exciting, full and
busy. We pretty much lived and breathed
youth ministry and church life day and night.
Who cared about the dishes at home – sometimes they sat there for two or
three days. We were carefree, young and
had so much time on our hands.
There were really only a few
balls to juggle back then.
As you grow up and gain more
responsibilities, more balls are added to the mix. People often ask me how I have the time to
make stuff and bake things with having 4 kids and a crazy husband who sometimes
acts like a fifth child (love you honey)... I’ve just learned to manage my time
wisely - until now.
Lately my dearest husband has had
the habit of saying the most annoying phrase over and over at the most
inopportune of times. While I’m wailing
about not having enough time to do this or that or make a certain meeting or
finish a certain job and expecting to hear him offer some sort of sympathetic reply
or offer me a pat on the back, he’ll retort back to me “You don’t have to live
this way.” (in a sing-song tone of voice that makes you grit your teeth in
annoyance).
It really irks me... because I
know he’s right.
I often find it hard to say ‘no’
to people – I’m one of those silly people who will sacrifice my life away just
to keep people happy. Sometimes it’s the
right thing to do, and sometimes it’s not.
Recently I read an article about learning
to say ‘no’. It pointed out something
I’ve never quite thought of before... that when you say ‘no’ you aren’t necessarily
being negative, you are just saying ‘yes’ to something else more important.
I have some very valuable ‘juggling
balls’ in my life... my relationship with Jesus, my dearest husband who is also
my bestest buddy, my darling children, my family and friends... and those
opportunities that come up in life that you just know are divinely appointed.
Those are the kinds of balls that
I don’t want to be dropping because the ‘meeting ball’ or ‘softie-order ball’
or ‘I-don’t-want-to-make-them-feel-bad-situation ball’ made the juggling act
impossible to maintain.
I don’t ever want to be the
person that walked on past the wounded man because I just had too much stuff to do.
So I’m starting to learn how to
juggle all over again... and this time I’m choosing my balls wisely.
22 comments
yep, sometimes we have to say no to good things to make room for great things. here here paisley jade;)
ReplyDeleteso true... :)
ReplyDeleteI think we all need to learn our limits. It's good to do stuff for others but only if it doesn't cross those limits. We're no good to anyone burnt-out!
Good stuff, so true!! Think I'm going to quote part of that on my twitter!!
ReplyDelete:) now go have a coffee and put your feet up
ReplyDeleteFabulous stuff there Kristy!
ReplyDeleteand in amonst that theres the looking after yourself ball.... I'm right there learning the same life lesson with you PJ!
ReplyDeleteI hear ya!
ReplyDeleteSmart Woman!
ReplyDeleteGood on you girl!!!
ReplyDelete"you are just saying ‘yes’ to something else more important" OH YEAH! great post missy!
ReplyDeleteI too am just learning that sometimes saying "no" to someone else, is the best thing for me and my family...
ReplyDeletegood for you! :) xo
ReplyDeleteYou GO Girl! xo
ReplyDeleteGreat post - it's reminded me to make sure that what I'm spending my time on is what is valuable in life and not just because I feel obliged to do it!
ReplyDeleteSounds very similar to my life... juggling juggling juggling, until at some point, I'm so exhausted - I have to drop the balls.
ReplyDeleteOr at least neatly put them to the side.
I'm learning too - it's okay to say "no".
I've been with my husband since I was 15. We got married when I was 19. Yep, been with him half my life. He too, will say things like... "no one is putting these expectations on you, besides yourself."
Argh... He's right!
Oh my goodness, I'm such a yes person it drives me crazy. Loved this post. Loved what you said about saying no to some things is really only saying yes to something more important. Wow.
ReplyDeleteAnd you are so cute!
I love when we find a companion that can give us reminders like that! My husband's phrase (often repeated) is, "Something's gotta go" - a suggesetion without being controlling. My usual response: "No, I just need to do things faster!" He shakes his head, and 24 hours later, I collapse in a heap and echo his words in defeat. Hoorah for balancing-us-out-spouses! (swung over after I kept seeing your name in the comments at all my favourite haunts!) ;)
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome Kristy. What a great post. Are you sending this in to DELVE?? You should!
ReplyDeleteAlso, my friend Donna has started an online mag as well; I'll bet she'd love this article. Email me if you;re interested and I'll give you are email address.
if it's not one ball too many!
xx
this is the second post I have read in the past few days about learning to say no. I love the way you put it, about juggling the balls.
ReplyDeleteI really need to listen to all these messages :)
I so could have written this - thanks for making me think again about what is important - I have been doing the same thing lately - spreading myself too thinly.
ReplyDeleteThat was a good read, especially as it resonated with me. I've never been awfully good at saying no, however recently I've had to practice that more than ever.
ReplyDeleteBTW, its not shock horror about being 18 when you got married. I was barely 19 when I married my wonderful hubby. It seems so young now but in light of the things that have happened to me since then it was all part of Gods plan.
Great post Kristy, I have lots of balls in the air at the moment. This helped me to get some perspective. xx
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments... I love hearing from you!!!